A black hole is a region of spacetime where gravity is so strong that nothing is capable of possessing enough energy to escape it. ~ Wikipedia

When I decided to do these daily blog posts, I knew there would be days when I wouldn’t be able to think of what to write — when my mind would be a black hole. This is one of those days.

But I also felt such days would be the best time to challenge and work my writing “muscle.” Even as I write, my mind is swirling with ideas of what to write about: yesterday’s drive to Detroit, the evening gathering of Steve’s family, my multi-cultural, multi-political, multi-religious upbringing, the quality (or lack of quality) of a cup of coffee, the news of the day — I could go on and on.

So, it seems “black hole” is not the proper metaphor for my inability to decide what to write about. “Hurricane” might be more applicable. Rather than an empty, vacuous brain, my brain is full of ideas swirling at such speed that I can’t grasp a single one. Within that storm of thoughts are flashes of lightning — those ever-present questions of “what will they think?” or “would anyone be interested?”

So, it’s time for me to reach my hand into that swirling storm and pick something. I grabbed last night’s gathering.

Steve and I arrived at his brother’s house around 4:00 yesterday. When we arrived, we found everyone in the backyard, sitting around tables in the shade of large trees. With Steve’s and my marriage being late in life, I haven’t had a lot of opportunity to get to know his family, so I was a bit nervous when we arrived. But my nervousness disappeared immediately when everyone stood and welcomed both of us with hugs and smiles.

The gathering consisted of Steve’s brother and his wife, (Jeff and Anne), who are parents of the groom, his sister and her husband (Kim and Roy) and Jeff and Anne’s three grown kids, Dave (the groom-to-be), Andrew and Hailey. Their partners were also there, including Kylie, the bride-to-be.

I had previously met most everyone, though it had been seven years since I’d seen two of Steve’s nephews. So, I looked forward to getting better acquainted.

I spent much of the visit listening to family memories of the past. There were the stories of Steve’s generation — the bands they were in, college mischief they’d gotten into, people they’d lost. And there were stories of his niece’s and nephews’ generation — their jobs, where they’d traveled, their hobbies.

I watched Anne and Jeff and remembered how I felt the evenings before my kids were to be married. I wondered if their minds were filled with the same sentimental thoughts I’d had about how fast it all went by, pride in their grown children, new chapters.

One of my favorite parts of the evening was seeing a family tree that Hailey had created so that her new boyfriend, upon his first introduction into the family, would know the names, faces and relationships of each person who would attend the gathering. What a sweet gesture for Hailey to do that!

My favorite topics of the evening were:

• The importance of authenticity (I once said to Steve, “To me, authenticity is heaven.”)
• The most important characteristic for a successful marriage? (I said “Focus on the positive.”)
• The wisdom we’ve gained as we’ve gotten older, the value of “our rearview mirrors.”

As I reflect on the conversations listed above, I’ve thought of yet another metaphor for trying to decide what to write about — rabbit hole. And therein lies the muscle I just strengthened. In this single post, I went from having nothing to write about to finding topics to save for future black hole/hurricane/rabbit hole days:

• Family
• Authenticity
• Growing Older, Growing Wiser