PHOTO PROMPT © Roger Bultot
My wife clutches my arm. “Look! There’s Maddie!” She points into the Great Hall from the balustrade, her eyes firing bolts of desperation.
The word steals a beat of my heart, even ten years later. “Where?” I ask, ninety-nine percent obliging, one percent hopeful.
“In the blue blouse.” She leaves me and chases down the stairway. “Hurry! They’re headed out the door!”
The night our daughter was taken, dark despair devoured the light in Kate’s blue eyes. Dare I admit it? I miss the peace I once found in those eyes—almost as much as I miss Maddie.
The End
99 Words
Friday Fictioneers is a compilation of writers from around the world who gather online weekly, guided by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. The challenge? To write a story in 100 words or less based on a new photo prompt. Thanks to Roger Bultot for the photo. Beautiful as the Great Hall is, I couldn’t help but look into the crowd for inspiration.
To read more stories in an online flash fiction anthology by Friday Fictioneer authors, click:
There seems to be an uncompleted thought in that ending. I think this needed more than 100 words
Neil, I sometimes struggle to find the right balance between saying too much and saying just enough. That’s one reason I like Friday Fictioneers–I don’t have much choice and it forces me to be sparse. But you’re right, I could have written a lot more here. Thanks for your comment!
Dear Jan,
A lot of story crammed into 100 words. The last line goes straight for the heart.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks, Rochelle. It helps when much of the story has already been told. I’ve learned that from you. 🙂
Can’t imagine what it would be like to have a child taken and always look for her/him.
I imagine it every time I hear the story of someone gone missing. How could you ever not look for his/her face in a crowd?
So sad – and they’ll continue to look for her in the crowds for the rest of their lives. I can’t imagine what they must go through on a daily basis. Liked your take on the prompt.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
Great story here. You capture that desperate longing of forlorn hope really well. The spare style of this piece suits its subject.
I love Friday Fictioneers because it forces me to be spare with my words, Josh. Thank you for your comment. My goal was to capture the desperate longing, as well as the father’s guilt over longing to have his wife back almost as much as his daughter.
I like the 1 percent hopeful. That’s what keeps us going.
I agree, Russell. How could a parent ever, ever give up hope? But, that’s also what makes losing a child this way so very sad.
I remember this heartbreaking case. There are no words for that kind of pain.
It seems like only yesterday to me. Hard to believe it’s been more than ten years. If you google images around Maddie’s disappearance, her poor parents have aged beyond ten years. 🙁
The last few lines are truly heartwrenching. How sad.
Click to read my FriFic tale
I wonder with the names if this is intentionally based on the real life Madeline McCann disappearance? A tragic case that has unfortunately been played out in the unforgiving British Press tabloids. That clinging on to hope is devastating.
Yes, it is, Iain. I have to admit, I hesitated writing about it, because I’m aware of the abuse of this poor family for publicity’s sake. But it’s what came to mind when I saw the girl in the light blue shirt, and it’s something I always think about when a child goes missing. I agree with you completely about clinging to hope, because what else can a parent do?
You’ve written that beautifully, Jan. To manage that switch from Kate’s desperation to Gerry’s admission that he longs for peace, and realises that Kate can no longer give it to him, takes very skilful writing. Kudos!
Thank you, Penny! 🙂
Heart-touching.
Really wish it was Maddie. Human hope is such. We keep hoping and hat’s what keeps us going…
You Make Me Feel Alive- Anita
I can’t imagine what it would be like to have a loved one…especially a child to disappear. Well done on the prompt. 🙂
Thank you, Courtney. I imagine the pain any time I see a story like this, but I don’t think we can possibly comprehend the depth and feeling of powerlessness.
This is heartbreaking, Jan. I think it is easier to deal with the death of a child rather than the disappearance… the longing, the waiting, the hoping… I would hate to imagine it.
I agree, Dale. The longing, looking and hoping would never end. How could it possibly?
Such a heartbreaking scenario. I’m not surprised she would see her lost child in the faces of others.
Joy, I could only imagine it’s exactly what I would do. So sad for any parent who has lost a child this way.
You are so good at these!
Thank you, Ruthie. 🙂
I wonder if you can ever get over something like that… a story we all know, and so much projected into the couple and their story.
A story we all know, yet most of us can’t possibly know. 🙁
A very heartbreaking tale beautifully written.
Thank you, Lisa.
All they have left is a tiny sliver of hope. What a terrible way to have to live out a life. I think you told the story very well.
Thank you, Jilly. That tiny sliver can be haunting as well as hopeful, I think.
Dear Jan,
You left nothing out and the story was just right. And telling and true.
And terrifying.
Yours,
D.
Thank you, Doug. Good to hear from you! I hope you are well and not affected by Kilauea.
This is a great take especially in view of the many children that go missing each year and are never traced.
Thank you, yarnspinnerr! 🙂
I desperately hope it was Maddie.
Your last line is poignant!
If only I could write a happy ending for this family. 🙁
It’s tough for the couple. And must be hard on their other children.
So tough . . . for them all.
Beautifully spare without losing any of the poignancy.
Thanks so much, Melody!
A beautifully sad story of the loss of his daughter and how this loss changed his wife. Well written! =)
Thank you, Brenda!