PHOTO PROMPT © Sandra Crook
Beautiful Once
Drizzle chilled her as she stared at the house across the street. It must have been beautiful once.
Beautiful once.
How could she not compare its demise to her marriage? It had been beautiful once, too.
Her gaze, blurred by tears, traced jagged cracks from the foundation, and the gaping hole in the front wall exposed the home’s very heart. She stood alone on the street, yet swore she heard the echo of children’s laughter as they chased each other up and down the stairs.
But it was empty. Irreparable. And memories wouldn’t matter, once it all came crumbling down.
THE END
Friday Fictioneers is a compilation of writers from around the world who gather online weekly, guided by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. The challenge? To write a story in 100 words or less based on a new photo prompt.
Click HERE to read more stories in an online flash fiction anthology by the Friday Fictioneers.
Thank you, Sandra Crook. Your photo brought back memories.
Very nicely written, Jan.
Thank you, Christiane! You should join this group. It’s fun to write 100 words every week.
Sigh!
Beautifully written, as always, Jan.
Thank you, Moon. Yours was beautiful and sad, too. I love the way you put words together.
A real sense of hopelessness in your words. Excellent.
Click to read my FriFic!
Your story made me laugh, Keith. Such a great contrast between your story and mine. 🙂
Oh, I felt so sorry for her! But I disagreed with her too… memories do matter, especially when it all comes crumbling down.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
You’re right that memories matter, Susan. I went back and forth about how I wanted to end this little story, but “she” told me to end it this way. 🙂
A sad metaphor. Nicely written.
Thank you, from this California girl, Iain. Loved your story!
A fluent story, using a powerful metaphor.
Thank you, Penny. I’ve enjoyed reading the variety of interpretations, and liked that you wrote about the car. 🙂
Well done, Jan. We both went the metaphor way!
I like your metaphor, too, Dale! This photo screamed “metaphor” to me. 🙂
It did indeed!!
Dear Jan,
This one made my heart ache. Beautifully written.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, Rochelle. It made me sad, too, because it is woven with truth.
Sad and, too often, true.
mine:
https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2018/01/26/a-whimsical-tale/
Scott
Yes, too often, true, Scott, as it has been for me in the past. A house (or a marriage) cannot survive when there’s no foundation.
Well done with a longer, sad story hinted at.
You picked up that well, Christine! There is, in fact, a much longer story. Too bad we only have 100 words! (Or maybe not.) 🙂
This is a lovely story, Jan. The sense of hopelessness and loss is something we can relate to.
Thank you, Kwadwo. I think you’re right–that many of us can relate to such a loss.
What a lovely story… and so sad. The parallel between the house and the marriage are excellent.
Thank you, Björn. I have seen many metaphors between a house and a marriage.
Some things are repairable. Great story.
You’re right, Dan. Perhaps beyond the 100 words, it might be! 🙂
This is heartbreaking. Strong metaphor, beautifully written.
Beautiful 🙂